Living Backwards
by Monica0510
Summary: Hermione had only been divorced for a month when she wandered into Flourish and Blotts and was confronted by someone from her past she would rather have left forgotten. But sometimes people deserve a second chance and Hermione thinks that she might just be in need of one of those herself. - Post DH and Canon compliant.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1: Let the Dust Settle**

She was over half an hour early to meet Ginny for lunch. Sometimes her compulsive desire to be early meant she did a lot of time wasting while she waited around for things to begin. Usually it was a frustrating cycle but at least she was in Diagon Alley where she could always duck in to Flourish and Blotts for a moment.

As she entered the grand store she took in a compulsory deep breath, soaking in the smell of books and knowledge mingling in the air. She knew that to the uninformed she might look slightly crazed, with bright wide eyes and an overly eager look on her face but this was _her_ environment. The people who frequented the store would probably understand her enthusiasm. She pushed deeper into the store and passed a stand of fine stationary and quills, her heart gave a glad leap.

She debated about where to start, annoyed already by her time constraints. Should she go straight for Magical History or should she start with Potions? Actually, she hadn't read a good book just 'for fun' in such a long time. The thought of picking up some fiction was rather appealing.

"Can I help you there madam? You seem a little overwhelmed by our selection," an amused voice asked from behind.

"Oh, sorry" she said spinning around.

It wasn't a perfect stranger before her as she had assumed it would be. It was Theodore Nott, her old classmate from Hogwarts. She hadn't seen him since before everything… happened.

"Nott!" she couldn't help but reply, in her surprise.

Hermione always remembered Theodore Nott the boy as a scowling, surly looking thing. He had scurried about with his eyes to the ground, never really demanding attention and respect the way some of his Slytherin contemporaries had. He had always been easily overlooked although Hermione had always thought he had a decidedly malevolent air about him. But the man in front of her wasn't a weedy, angry young boy. He hadn't grown into an Adonis certainly, but his mouth was actually stretching into a smile and that smile was directed at her. It made him look almost normal. The surprise nearly knocked her off balance.

"I thought that might have been you Granger, what with the hair."

Her own features quickly assumed a scowl, "Okay Nott, we left school years ago. No need to be nasty."

He put up his hands in a placating gesture and looked genuinely remorseful, "I didn't mean it that way. Sorry. I just meant that you still look like you did back in School, from behind."

Considering quite a few years had passed and Hermione's waist line had gained a few inches she guessed that was sort of a compliment.

"You work here?" she asked.

He shrugged, "Sure, why not."

"I never pictured you working in a bookstore," she mused aloud.

He rolled his eyes, "Well you probably thought I'd prefer to be a dungeon master or baby murderer instead, didn't you?"

Hermione was taken aback, "I didn't say that although you can't really blame me if I did. You barely said a word back in school unless it was some vile insult. I bet you formed your own opinions about me too."

"I'll concede that I found you as hard to be around as you probably found me," he said with a twinkle in his eye that made Hermione unsure as to whether she should be offended or not, "back then at least," he finished.

"I guess we've grown up though?" she asked.

"I guess we have," he replied, again with the smile.

"You can't be all that bad if you like books," Hermione stated.

"Granger, I was a horrible child but I can safely say that it is precisely because of books that I am no longer vile."

She smiled genuinely at that.

"That's a therapy I could really get behind."

He leaned casually against a shelf of magical biographies that all looked rather affronted by his lack of respect.

"I don't have to ask about what you've been up to, I read The Prophet after all."

Hermione sighed, "Yes well, apparently being best friends with Harry Potter turned into a lifetime commitment to answering nosey questions from the media and having ones every career move stalked and scrutinized."

Nott raised an eyebrow, "I think the work you've been doing with Goblins is very interesting, not to mention your work with House Elves."

Hermione exhaled sharply, "Nott, you really surprise me."

He chuckled, "I don't doubt it."

"So what have you been up to?" she asked.

"After everything happened," he said with a look on his face that most people got when that particular segment of the past was mentioned, "I decided to sort myself out. I'd been living under a belief system instilled in me from birth by people who turned out to be cruel and wrong in the eyes of the majority of the population. I decided to stop listening to other people and start figuring it out for myself. So I took off travelling and read a lot of books and now, here I am. It took a while but I'm finally back in the mother country and better for everything that happened. At least, I hope so."

Hermione shook her head in disbelief, "I should say so considering you've just had a five minute conversation with a muggle born. That's quite an evolution of character Nott and all revealed to me in under thirty seconds" Hermione said.

"Sorry about that," he replied although his unabashed manner seemed to betray that in fact he wasn't, "thought I'd just get it all out of the way so we could skip the Slytherin-Gryffindor enemies for life spiel entirely. I actually spent most of my time travelling in the muggle world you know," he informed her, "Didn't use magic for months on end."

"Wow," Hermione replied, suitably impressed, "Well I'm afraid to reveal that you're far more in touch than I am. I've wanted to try going muggle for a month for, oh, ages now. As a sort of experiment."

"It's quite liberating," he informed her, "How about you? Have you travelled much? I meant, outside of travel for work."

"No," she said sadly, "Ron and I got married and then the kids came along and the career and the only place I find I've been is Australia to visit my parents."

"Australia's great though, if you like beaches," Nott replied.

"You've been?"

"Sure. I lived there for a couple of months. Asia was more my cup of tea though, and Eastern Europe."

"Wow," Hermione replied, "You certainly do sound like you've spent your time well."

"And my money," Nott said with a wink, "I thought, what better way to get rid of those dirty galleons than to spend them in the muggle slums of India and Brazil?"

"Hence why you're now working in a book store I guess," Hermione replied with a smile.

"Sure. Speaking of which, can I give you a hand with anything?"

"Well actually, I was thinking I might try something a bit different. Maybe go for some light reading for a change. Maybe even some fiction."

Nott let out a low whistle, "The great Hermione Granger, letting her hair down with a novel. Well, you've come to the right place. Muggle or magical?"

Hermione frowned, "I don't know. I get so overwhelmed when I come in here; it's hard to make up my mind."

"Muggle," he told her definitively, "There hasn't been a good wizarding novel published since the dark ages."

She laughed, "Lead the way to the muggle fiction then."

He led her through a series of aisles until they reached the very back of the store where there was a substantial collection of ordinary muggle paperbacks. The lack of waving and winking faces on the covers made it a rather still and peaceful section to browse.

"This is my corner," Nott told her, "No one else likes to lurk back here. They find it boring."

"Any suggestions then? Since you're the professional."

Nott pulled a collection of short stories from the shelf.

"Somerset-Maughm. He was an obese, gay man travelling the world on his own in the early part of the 20th century. When the world was still full of adventure and intrigue."

Hermione laughed, "Not like today I suppose?"

Nott shrugged, "Go find out for yourself would be my suggestion. I think you'll like Somerset-Maughm though, I defy anyone who doesn't. I particularly enjoyed his short story 'The Painted Veil' but that might just be because I have an extreme fondness for China."

What an intriguing man he was. Nott had definitely not been this easy-going back in school, to think that this mature and knowledgeable man had been lurking somewhere within that nasty shell of a boy back then. If she had suspected she might have paid him a little more attention back in school. Unavoidably her eyes searched out his bare forearm for the place where she knew something evil must still lurk under the skin. To her surprise, she hadn't noticed before but his entire forearm was covered in a sleeve of ink. It was a delicate and intricate muggle tattoo that she wasn't quite close enough to fully make out. It definitely didn't look evil though.

"I'll take your word for it," she replied, gently taking the proffered book.

"You won't regret it," he replied, smiling again in a polite way that belied his patient submission to her gaze.

She felt herself returning the smile. Involuntarily she returned his direct, steady gaze and realized how very incredibly deep his eyes were. A rich brown that was almost black.

"Theo," an impatient voice called from deeper within the store.

"That's me," he said looking a little regretful.

"Right," she replied, "I'd better go meet Ginny anyway."

"Sure," he said and then he turned to leave, "You know, I would pass on my regards to the rest of the Weasley's only…"

"Yes," Hermione interjected, "I understand. Not the most Slytherin-friendly family out there. Sorry about that." Some old grudged still wouldn't die.

"Enjoy the book," he said and she watched as his form moved away. She noticed that he was tall but that he had a delicate bone-structure. He wasn't broad in any sense of the word but he definitely couldn't be called weedy any more either. Just as she was admitting to herself that she liked the way his muggle-style trousers fit him when he stopped and turned and oh god, caught her staring.

"You should come back if you like the book Granger," he called, "I have loads of other recommendations."

She nodded and smiled, feeling terribly embarrassed but also pleased.

He waved and then they both turned and walked away.

That night, Hermione lay in bed alone reading her new book and trying to remember why she disapproved of tattoos.

"Let the dust settle," she muttered to herself in frustration.

She'd barely been divorced for a month.

 _AN: This is of course a work of fanfiction- I don't own a thing. Please read and review and I will likely return the favour._


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: The Symptoms of Niffle Malnutrition**

"What are you reading?" Ernie asked, taking his usual spot across from her in the lunch room.

"Somerset Maughm," she replied, "and actually, I just finished," she said snapping the book shut and feeling quite satisfied.

"Never heard of them," Ernie said, taking a noisy bite from his cheese sandwich.

"A muggle," she clarified.

"Oh," Ernie replied absently, clearly not really interested at all, "Speaking of books though, I need to pop down to Flourish and Blotts to pick up a gift. Want to come? You'll need a new book."

Hermione was slightly mortified by the thought of returning to the store so soon but at the same time, she felt a strong desire to see if Nott could recommend her another good read. She needed another book after all and Ernie wanted a companion. It was perfectly reasonable to go.

"I don't know…" she teased, "I still have your riveting paper on the symptoms of Niffle malnutrition in captivity to read."

"Please," he pleaded, levelling her with an imploring stare.

She chuckled, "After work I guess."

It was only after Ernie had gone on his way whistling a rather shaky Celistina Warbeck song that Hermione realized that going with Ernie might give people the wrong impression. They were just work colleagues but surely by now everyone had read about her and Ron's divorce. It was still being rehashed in the prophet and Skeeter was looking for any possible scandalous angle and thankfully coming up with very little. Some old grudged would never die.

Over the top of a shelf later that evening, she spotted his short black hair that still idiosyncratically looked like it would be soft to touch.

"I read your book," she said coming around the corner as he stacked some shelves, "I read your book and I liked it."

He jumped a little, disturbing some precariously balanced history tomes. One tumbled to the ground, landing right on his toe which caused him to curse loudly.

"Sorry!" Hermione gushed in mortification, "I'm so sorry!"

She bent to help clear up the mess she had caused.

"Occupational hazard," he said laughing.

"I should have given you a bit of warning," she said, straightening with an armload of books.

"It's fine Granger," he said still grinning and reaching forward to relieve her of the load. After he had carefully shelved the majority he turned to her again.

"You liked it. That's good. I knew you would."

"Loved it actually," she gushed, "Afraid I'm back for another recommendation. I'm hooked on this reading for pleasure thing now I think."

"Careful," Nott said with feigned concern, "It starts out like any soft drug. First you start with short stories and then next thing you know, you're hooked on literary crack and sitting up all night reading the unfathomable murk that is Thomas Pynchon just because you can."

A shiver of pleasure rippled its way down Hermione's spine at the thought. It took her a moment to register that she was savouring the mental image of her and Nott in bed together, entangled and both hungrily devouring a book. She snapped herself out of it with a sharp shake to the head.

"Are you okay?" he asked with an amused smile.

"Yes, of course."

"So," he said slowly, carefully stacking a couple of books neatly on the shelf, "What are you after?"

"Give me something else about a far off lands and adventures I'll never have," Hermione replied.

Nott stopped what he was doing and turned to her with a questioning look on his face.

"What?" she asked.

"I was just checking to see if I could spot any symptoms."

"Of?"

"Wanderlust"

"Wanderlust?"

"Oh yeah," he said flashing a neat row of neat white teeth, "I surmise that you have it bad. Which is why I think you should read a book called Wild Swans. It's set in China. It's about three generations of women from the same family. I think you'd be into it."

"Sounds like my kind of read," Hermione acquiesced.

"I have a copy out the back, just give me a second and I'll fetch it for you."

He wandered off to find her book for her leaving her alone to ponder why on earth she felt so drawn to this character. Was it because he now projected an air of mystery rather than malevolence? Because he'd gone and lived in a world she would never access? Maybe she was just so pathetically starved for company and he just happened to enjoy the same kinds of things she did.

"Hermione?" a pompous voice called from close by, startling her from her reverie.

"Over here Ernie," she called, "By the home-charms section."

He came bustling around the corner with a thick book under his arm.

"Oh, there you are!"

"Did you find what you were looking for?" she asked.

He showed her the cover of the book which was a blur of moving images who all seemed to be waving their arms about and arguing with each other. She noticed that a great deal of them seemed to be wearing elaborate crowns and one of them seemed to be threatening another with a sceptre.

"Wizarding Royalty throughout the Ages," Ernie said proudly, "Dad's going to love it."

"Here it is!" interjected another deep voice, rounding the corner and Nott entered their presence waving a thick paperback about.

He stopped in his tracks when he spotted Ernie who in retaliation lifted his head and morphed his features from their usual expression of pompous good-nature into something almost menacing.

"Nott," he positively growled. Hermione had to put out a steadying hand to brace herself on the bookshelf.

"Oh good," she said weakly, "You remember him," which was obvious really. Clearly Ernie and Nott had not forgotten each other.

"I'm afraid Macmillan and I never quite got along in school, Granger," Nott explained, not taking his eyes off Ernie's angry face.

"That's an understatement if ever I've heard one," Ernie said darkly.

The thing about Ernie was, although he was usually very gentle, he was actually quite tall and thickly built so when he drew himself up to his full height and assumed an aggressive stance the over-all affect was really quite alarming. Hermione wondered when he'd learnt to do that, certainly not while they were still in school.

"I think we should leave Hermione," Ernie said in a commanding voice that didn't really broker argument.

"Couldn't we all just forgive and forget?" she tried hopefully, "Nott's been really rather nice to me. School was such a long time ago. A lot has happened."

Ernie turned his baleful glare on her.

"Okay, let's go," she said, shooting Nott an apologetic glance.

They turned to leave.

"Hermione wait," he called out.

He quickly crossed the few metres they had already covered and offered her the book, carefully staying a full arms-length. She caught an expression in his face as he carefully averted his eyes and she was surprised to see that he really looked ashamed.

"Thanks," she said and she smiled before Ernie quickly tugged her away.

The mystery of it all drove her quite mad all night and then again all day at work. All Ernie would say was that Nott had tried his best to make his life miserable at school and he would reveal nothing more but it was obvious to Hermione that something beyond common schoolyard pranks and bullying had taken place.

Try as she might, she simply couldn't stop thinking about it and about Theodore Nott. She recalled the ashamed expression on his face time and time again and wished she had a way to help him to explain his actions to Ernie. If there was an explanation… and maybe there just wasn't which is probably why he hadn't spoken up in the first place.

She resolved that it was inevitable that she popped into Flourish and Blotts after work. She simply had to speak to him.

Only, she didn't get an opportunity that afternoon. Or the day after, or the day after that. There was another Goblin crisis that required urgent attention and by the time it had been resolved and the economy rescued, a whole week had passed.

It was a tired and dejected Hermione that walked into Flourish and Blotts the next Thursday afternoon. She did a quick once around the shop and found that she couldn't spot him anywhere so she decided to just be a grown-up and ask for him.

"Hello," she said, approaching a clerk at one of the service counters, "I'm looking for Theodore Nott."

The elderly woman looked confused for a moment before her kindly face perked up into a smile of recognition, "You mean Theo. Yes, I'm afraid you've just missed him my dear. He's gone off to Africa or India somewhere on one of his little adventures."

Hermione's heart sank. "Gone, you say? What a pity."

She hoped her face didn't betray how truly disappointed she really felt.

"Wait," the woman said staring at Hermione shrewdly, "Aren't you Hermione Granger?"

Hermione tried to smile but was afraid it was rather a weak attempt, "Yes I am."

"Well, in that case I actually have a letter of sorts for you. Well, not really a letter. He said he was helping you with book recommendations…" and with that she bent below the counter and began rustling around, looking for something.

"Ah!" Hermione heard after a moment and then the woman's head reappeared, "Here it is."

She handed over a scrap piece of paper that had Hermione's name on the top and a hastily scribbled note that said 'Sorry, I had to take off for a while – Theo'.

Below it was a list of five books.

Life of Pi by Yann Martel

Norwegian Wood by Haruki Murakmai

Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy

Out of Africa by Isak Dinneson

The Little Prince by Albert de Saint Aubery

In truth, Hermione had already read The Little Prince and Anna Karenina. The former as a child and the latter as a teenager on one of her visits home to her parents. The list made her smile.

"Anything I can help you with my dear?" the woman asked kindly, "I'm sure Theo has made sure we have copies of all the books on that list."

Hermione smiled back at her warmly, "In that case, I'll take a copy of each of them. He didn't say when he'd be back did he? Mr Nott I mean."

"Sorry," the old woman replied, "No idea. Could be a month or a year by the sounds of it."

 _AN: This is of course a work of fanfiction, I own nothing. Please take the time to review so that I can grow as a writer and I shall endeavour to return the favour._


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: Rash Decision**

Later, much later, Hermione confided her fascination with Theodore Nott to Ginny. They were having dinner at her house. Harry had gone to a quidditch match with Ron.

"Theodore Nott?" Ginny asked shocked, "Isn't he the evil, weedy little one?"

Hermione sighed, "Well, yes he was once."

"He's not anymore?" Ginny asked in a disbelieving tone.

"Quite frankly," Hermione said with fading patience, "I fail to see why everyone is so convinced that people can't change."

Ginny put up her hands in surrender, "If you say he's changed Hermione, he's changed."

"The thing is Ginny," Hermione confided, "I don't know why I'm so interested in him. I mean, I don't know what it is about him. He's not grown into a particularly handsome man and I still barely know anything about him except that he's apparently spent all of his inheritance on travelling and living in the muggle community."

"Well there you go," said Ginny as though it was fairly obvious, "That's why. He's lived the kind of life you missed out on."

Hermione was horrified, "Ginny, I don't regret anything about my life."

Ginny rolled her eyes, "I'm not saying that you do or that you should. I know you wouldn't change a thing. You have Rose and Hugo and you had 15 good years with Ron before it stopped working. What I'm talking about are unattained fantasies. We all have them."

"And what are yours? Mrs Married to the Hero of the Wizarding World and professional sports-writer retired from a very long, very successful career in premier-league quidditch"

Ginny chuckled, "I'd have liked to written novels," she said, "Not the good ones. The really bad pirate themed romances."

Hermione burst into laughter at this. "It's not too late Gin."

"No indeed," Ginny said, "And that goes for you too."

"What?" Hermione asked, "Leave the kids and go gallivanting around the world? I don't think so."

"Hermione," Ginny said in exasperation, "The kids are at Hogwarts most of the year. Why do you think boarding school was invented?"

"Get serious Gin."

"Hermione, now is the perfect time! You're free of any responsibility. Free of my brother, free of the kids. Why don't you go exploring?"

"Because I have my job, that's why."

Ginny groaned with frustration, "Hermione, how many times have you turned down the opportunity to take you work overseas?"

And then it hit her. Ginny was absolutely right. She was free. Free to travel, free to form inappropriate crushes on unknown Slytherin's from her past. Why was she feeling guilty about these feelings? She was free.

"You know," she conceded, "I think you might have a point about why I'm fascinated with Nott. Maybe he does represent all the pipe dreams I've put aside."

"Also," Ginny said, "He works in a book store and actually reads for pleasure. He's pretty much your wet dream."

Hermione had to laugh.

"I just can't believe that Nott's a dish now," Ginny said with a disgusted look on her face.

"He's not, well not by your standards anyway."

"Oh that's right," Ginny replied pulling yet another face, "you found my brother attractive. Well I can't wait to see Ron's reaction when you start shagging Nott."

"I'm not going to start shagging Nott!"

Ginny only smiled, "So you say. So you say."

"Hey Hermione," Ron said, bending down to awkwardly kiss her on the cheek.

"Hi," she replied smiling gently at him.

"Can I introduce you to Rebecca?" he asked stepping aside to reveal an attractive, younger blonde who was looking extremely anxious.

Hermione waited for the pang of jealousy to descend but found that it barely came. Yes, the woman was younger, thinner and probably much prettier but Ron had a glow about him that had been missing for years and anyway, a soothing mental image of Nott in tight trousers popped into her head.

She smiled at the girl, proffering her hand, "It's so nice to meet you Rebecca. I've heard so much about you from Ron."

"Me too," Rebecca squeaked nervously, "And from books. I've read about you lots in the prophet too. It's all about overwhelming really. The Golden Trio, all here. Harry Potter is actually cooking like a muggle on a barbeque."

"Which is inevitably going to mean burnt sausages for dinner," Hermione said with a sigh, "Maybe I should go and rescue them."

"I think Ginny's on the case," Ron said, putting an arm around Rebecca, perhaps to steady her nerves.

"There's no need to feel overwhelmed," Hermione said in what she hoped was a kind and patient tone of voice, "I assure you, we haven't actively tried to kill any dark lords together for nearly two decades and retirement suits us all nicely I think. Well, not that Harry has retired from the business really, come to think of it. But anyway, we're all just daggy parents now really."

"Speak for yourself!" Ron said with mock offense.

Hermione rolled her eyes at him with an affectionate smile, "So how did you two meet?" she asked turning to Rebecca.

Ron and Rebecca looked at each other for a moment, Hermione noticed a deep stain make its way across the blondes face and Ron was looking pretty sheepish.

"I guess it was before the divorce was finalized? I'm guessing through work," she said to put them out of their misery after the silence became strained.

"We've been separated for nearly a year," Ron said defensively.

"And I'm not bothered in the slightest, so you can both relax" she told him patiently.

The couple exhaled in complete synchronisation.

There wasn't anything wrong with the situation but Hermione still found herself going over things she and Ron had said and done while she lay in bed that night. Where had it gone wrong? When?

What drove her really crazy was that he was so ready to just leap back into it like that with such a young woman. Wasn't he afraid the same thing would happen all over again? The bickering. The cold nights on separate sides of the bed, a clearly demarcated border down the middle. Then finally, the empty nights with just her in bed and him out wherever he was.

But a part of her did understand. The sad, lonely part of her that she tried very hard to repress. The part that made her chest ache when she thought about how warm and filled with laughter her life used to be.

Of course, it was different when the kids were around. It was easy to banish that small part of her.

But the kids never seemed to be around.

It got her thinking about what Ginny had said to her. About going overseas, searching for those dreams she once harboured as a girl. Dreams of romantic trysts on Greek islands and being kissed by the sun on the Ivory Coast.

It was with these thoughts that she drifted off to sleep.

For her it seemed like a rash decision.

Only one week later she found herself in a meeting with her direct boss. Only one week of deliberation. Her cheeks flushed with anxiety. How unlike her this was.

"So in conclusion," she continued, "I really think I would be more efficient if I spent a bit of time out in the field working on our relations with the goblins on an international scale. I absolutely insist upon it in fact. It's quite crucial that I at least get to Egypt and I should probably visit our sister department in Mexico city, they've developed some interesting policy in regards to their grave robbing problems and I think..."

"Hermione" her boss Hortense tried to interrupt.

"...that if you just think about it, I'll be perfectly capable of running things from overseas. I mean obviously I'll have to appoint someone to do the day to day but I'll keep myself and informed and it's only a few months and..."

"HERMIONE!"

She stopped stunned, her mouth hanging open quite rudely.

"I've been telling you that you need a holiday for years!"

"But Hortense, are you sure?" she asked, "I mean, it's not really a holiday. I plan to do some work."

Hortense gave a deep chuckle, "I dare say I couldn't stop you if I wanted to but let's just call it a holiday for convenience sake, eh? You've got quite a bit of leave built up, wouldn't hurt to use some of it."

One week after Christmas she was methodically packing her bag, for the second time. She checked off items on the list on the bed as Harry watched on with amusement.

"Is this really necessary? You already checked everything."

"Harry," she whined, "This is a big deal."

He smiled over at her.

"I know it is. I'll just miss you, that's all."


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: The Heat**

And Harry did miss her. He missed her when she was in Egypt and sent him a photo of herself riding a camel in the desert. He missed her when she was on safari in South Africa and on that unexpected detour to Palestine and Israel on diplomatic business that made him a little uncomfortable. The whole family laughed at the post card she sent of the leaning tower of Pisa, she had charmed it to actually fall over.

Gradually he got used to not having her there to consult when things at work got a little overwhelming. He started to miss her a little less but still got a pang when he got an owl or a letter describing her negotiations with vampires in Mexico, her squabbles with the Ecuadorian Ministry, her week in an Ashram in India. It felt weird that she was having adventures without him and Ron but of course, everything was different now.

He wanted her back. He didn't want her to come back. Whatever he wanted, she would be back in time for Rose and Hugo.

She got in on the morning of the Hogwarts train and made it to the station, literally puffing with exertion in her haste.

It took her a moment to make out the others in the crowd. They had their backs to her.

Harry and Ginny and their smaller ones were there. So was Ron. She was relieved to see that he hadn't brought the girlfriend along. Not because she minded but because she knew the children would.

She swept up behind them, simultaneously tapping Harry and Ron on the shoulders.

They both jumped a little. She supposed she should have known better than to sneak up on trained Aurors.

"Constant vigilance!" she barked, cracking a broad smile.

She was swept up into her families embrace. Even Ron and it was only a little strange.

"You look amazing!" Ginny practically shrieked with sweet Lily concurring loudly.

She was one to talk. How the woman could pop out babies and still have the figure of a teenager was beyond Hermione's comprehension.

"Hermione, you really do," Ron told her, looking at her fondly.

She struck a sarcastic pose, uncomfortable with the attention.

"What do you think Harry?" Ginny said.

"I think you she looks younger, happier too," he said, sending Hermione a wink.

"I'll be happy when I see my children!" she informed them, "Hugo's barely written more than two legible sentences in months."

She and Ron exchange a look that confirmed her suspicions: he hadn't even been getting that.

"Never mind," Ginny soothed, "He'll get used to things. What's most important is that we are all going to have a lovely summer together."

A couple of weeks into that lovely, complicated summer she told Ginny over a glass of wine about the love affair she'd had with a beautiful Mexican man named Guillermo.

She finally admitted that she had married Ron too young. Had never had the certainty that Ginny had felt. Was just as much responsible for the disintegration of her marriage. She could finally admit now that she was even glad for it.

She hoped her children would forgive her soon. Forgive them both.

She confided in Ginny that sometimes, on lonely nights, in strange hotel rooms, in hot countries she would think about Nott and wonder whether he was somewhere near her.

During a particularly brutal heat wave she irrationally decided to do the shopping for the next school term. She dragged her heavy-limbed children to Diagon Alley, consoling them with the promise of ice cream.

They went through the motions, barely managing to distract themselves from their sweaty thoughts even to express interest in visiting their Uncle's joke shop. It was a long day.

Finally they descended on Fortescue's and even managed to secure a table in the shade outside to devour their sweet treat, books and supplies all safely in hand.

The children had actually been remarkably well behaved in the past couple of days. While their aggression had been more markedly directed at Ron it still made for a nice change that they were actually talking to her properly again. Maybe the heat had driven off the energy they required to stay angry. Not that she blamed them really.

She was enjoying the peaceful moment with her little family, catching an errant stream of melted chocolate ice-cream with her mouth as it dripped down her hand. That was when she noticed him staring at her from across the street.

Immediately she raised her hand, smiling and beckoned him over.

"Hello Granger," he greeted her warmly, ducking down to give her sticky cheek a kiss.

She could only hope that he would interpret the flush as due to the heat.

"Theodore, I'd like you to meet my children. This is Rose and this is Hugo."

Nott greeted them pleasantly, enquiring about their ice cream and then complimenting them on their choices.

Finding out that he had been a Slytherin in their mothers year at Hogwarts, Hugo immediately launched into a recount of Gryffindors latest quidditch victory over Slytherin house. Nott pulled up a chair, meeting Hermione's eyes over Hugo's head. He gave her a little smile.

"Hugo darling, I'm sure he doesn't want to hear about how bad Slytherin still is at quidditch."

He scoffed at her, "Really Granger, always a Gryffindor eh? I expected better from you."

"I'm in Ravenclaw," Rose interjected, "We didn't win the Quidditch cup but I think it's all rather stupid anyway."

Hugo poked out his tongue at her and they immediately began an argument about who was in the better house.

"I hear you've been gallivanting around the world Granger," Nott said softly while the children were distracted.

"I heard you were doing the same thing," she replied.

He shrugged, "For a couple of months, reading between the lines in the Prophet it looks like you've been more than making up for some lost time travel wise" he said that with a genuine and encouraging smile which she replied to in kind.

"Well I really have you to thank," she told him, "All those books you recommended really lit a fire in my belly"

She found herself blushing after that last sentence, reminded by his presence once again that Nott was capable of lighting a very different kind of fire in her belly too.

"Mom, I'm finished," Hugo whined a little rudely, "and I want to go home. It's hot".

Hermione shot Nott an apologetic look, "It's been a long day for the kids and I have to take them to their fathers now."

Both Rose and Hugo groaned at this which Hermione found a little embarrassing.

"Alright you two, let's get going. We've got to get you to your Dad's house"

The children both groaned and Hermione made another mental note to sit down and have a good chat with them about the situation with their dad. She only hoped Nott hadn't picked up on their reluctance to see Ron, for some reason the thought embarrassed her.

Nott stood up with them as they readied to leave.

"Nice to meet you Rose, Hugo" he said, nodding to each of the children in turn, "Enjoy the rest of your summer holidays".

The children responded politely and almost succeeded in concealing their sudden impatient desire to escape the oppressive heat now that all the ice-cream was gone.

"Are you back at Flourish and Blotts?" Hermione asked him, "It's only that we didn't see you in there when we were in earlier getting school supplies".

Theo shrugged, "I was on my lunch break probably but yes, I'm there for now. Actually, I'm working on another project at the moment as well".

That had certainly piqued Hermione's interest but one look at Hugo's face was enough to see that the children would not have the patience for her to prove any further.

"Actually Hermione," he continued and she could sense some hesitancy in his voice, he shot a furtive glance at the children before seemingly making up his mind to speak, "I was really hoping to get the chance to talk to you about the project. Preferably over dinner?"

Hermione felt herself colouring, "I'd like that" she replied softly.

A great smile broke its way across Theodore's face, "Tomorrow night?" he asked.

She nodded, "The kids are at their dad's so that should be fine."

"It's a date," he said and Hermione knew that he had meant to convey exactly what his intentions were. She felt her heartbeat speed up in her chest but even that didn't distract her from the way Rose's eyes had suddenly narrowed with realization.

"Bye Theodore," she said, "owl me with the details"

And then she was pushing her two kids by the shoulder in front of her in the direction of the Leaky Cauldron. Suddenly she wanted to be far away from Diagon Alley.

But her embarrassment couldn't stop her from peeking over her shoulder.

Nott gave her a cheeky smile as he watched her walk away.

Her head snapped forward and she marched the children onwards.

"Mum," Rose wined, "I think that man just asked you out!" she said, her tone conveying all of the shock she clearly felt.

Hugo scoffed, "No he didn't Rosey," but then suddenly a strange look crossed his face and he turned on Hermione, "Did he mum?"

Hermione sighed deeply, "When we get to your fathers' house, I think the four of us need to talk about your dad and I dating other people" was all she would say on that matter.

"Oh my god it is a date, he wasn't just joking!" Rose squeaked and Hugo merely had the grace to look disgusted.

Hermione's stomach dropped, not only did she have to find a way to convince her kids that their parents were happier apart and dating other people but now she had 24 excruciating hours to agonize over her forthcoming date.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5: A Demand for Chocolate Cake**

Later that night, Hermione found herself sitting down to dinner with her ex-husband and her two children in his shiny new apartment.

The children had been less than thrilled about both coming to Ron's and the talk they knew they were about to have but Hermione was determined that they wouldn't let bad feelings and misunderstandings ruin any more of their time with their dad and that probably meant that she had to come clean about wanting to date other people so that the children could see that she wasn't some poor, dumped wife.

"Okay guys," Ron said, entering the room with a smile on his face, "I made your favourite"

He was wearing a frilly pink apron and two enormous matching oven mitts that he'd obviously filched from the Burrow. Clearly, he was desperate to make the kids laugh in the hopes that he would get back into their good books that way. Usually it worked out.

"Dad!" Rose groaned, "You are so embarrassing" but Hermione could see the smile at the corner of her mouth and Hugo was openly cracking up.

"What?" Ron said, feigning ignorance as he laid a plate full of spaghetti down in front of Hermione.

"Hermione, what are they talking about?"

"I honestly don't know" she said, playing along.

When everybody had been served he sat down to join them, still in his pink apron.

"Salud," Hermione said, raising her glass in a salute to Ron, "thanks Dad" she added with a smile.

"Thanks Dad," the kids echoed before digging into their food.

"Right then Hermione," Ron mumbled through a mouth full of food (some things would never change), "You called this Granger-Weasley family meeting because…?"

Hermione swallowed her mouthful of food before replying, "Because it's high time we explained to the kids that both of us have started to date other people and that we are both happy for each other and happier for it and we hope that they will be happy for us too."

Ron choked on his mouthful of pasta, "we are?" he finally coughed out.

Hermione rolled her eyes, he knew to what Ron was referring.

"Yes we are."

"A man asked Mum out today," Rose supplied, rather bluntly.

"Is that so?" Ron said in a strange tone.

"It's not like you don't have a girlfriend!" Hugo accused, "Don't be such a hypocrite!"

"Alright," Hermione eased, her palms up in mediator stance, "let's not jump down his throat. Your Dad didn't know that I had started dating again, he was just a little surprised. Right Ron?"

"Right," Ron replied, still looking a little lost for words.

"And on the topic of jumping down Dad's throat, do either one of you want to explain to me why he's the one copping all the blame for the divorce? You know we _both_ decided it would be better if we separated, we explained it all to you almost two years ago."

"It just seems like it was all his idea," Rose shot back, a defiant look on his face, "You can deny it all you want Mum, we know it was Dad who wanted to move out."

It was true that it had been Ron who had first suggested that they trial a separation but that had come after a year or more of failed counselling and tense married life and it honestly hadn't been a great shock to Hermione. In fact it had been a relief that he was finally willing to be the one to actually say the words and make it real: their marriage was failing.

"Honey, that's just not true" Hermione told her sadly.

"Your Mum and I love each other," Ron jumped in, his fork jabbing the air emphatically, "and we were so happy for so many years but some things change. _We_ changed. We didn't want the same things anymore and we couldn't make it work."

"We tried," Hermione continued, "but it just got harder when you guys went off to Hogwarts and we realized that the thing that was really keeping us together was the fact that we love you both to pieces."

"But loving your kids and being great friends isn't enough sometimes in a marriage," Ron finished sadly.

Hermione nodded solemnly in agreement.

"So Dad wasn't shagging anyone on the side?" Hugo asked Hermione.

"Hugo!" she admonished, "No!"

Ron looked wounded, "Why did you think that?" he asked.

"There are rumours," Rose explained, "at school."

Hermione rolled her eyes, "No doubt fuelled by that pernicious Skeeter woman" she mumbled, "well it's just not true. Trust me guys, both of us made the decision to call it quits on the marriage and both of us will always, always be grateful that we had so many good years. Right Ron?"

"More than grateful," Ron said looking at her in that familiar way, like she had the answer to everything.

Hermione reflected a little sadly that sometimes it was the fact that she 'always knew the answer' that had aggravated Ron so much that they ended up endlessly bickering.

It would never cease to amaze her that you could both love and hate the same thing about a person.

"Okay," Rose said, clearly digesting what they had to say, "But we don't want to have your girlfriend forced on us, do we Hugo?" she asked him.

Hugo just stuck his fingers down his throat and pretended to gag.

"Or that man if you do go on a date with him, Mum. Not unless you guys get married or something."

Hermione chuckled, "I haven't got plans to get married again anytime soon"

She noticed something flash across Ron's face briefly before he laughed as well. It had only been a second but it was enough to sew a seed in Hermione's mind.

She determined to ask him about it later, once the kids were out of earshot.

"So are we all good?" she asked the family, "Even though Dad and I got a divorce and even though we might want to see other people- are we all okay with all of this? Do we know that we all still love each other"

The kids rolled their eyes but nodded and Ron gave a hearty 'yep' of approval.

"Good, I call this Granger-Weasley family meeting to a close with one final demand for chocolate cake!"


End file.
